||[Feb. 16th, 2006|05:56 am]
a & j inc.
absolutely no one, save my mother, is excited about my wedding, including me.|
i know this is turning into less of a wedding planning journal and more of a wedding complaint journal, but seriously, how do people get excited about spending thousands of dollars on a party that no one actually wants to go to? i mean, if you can afford it, then by all means throw a huge shindig and feed everyone caviar. i support that. what i don't understand is the EXPECTATION that EVERYONE is supposed to provide an elegant soiree for four hundred guests. i've actually been told that i shouldn't get married because i can't afford a wedding. i'm sorry, my partner shouldn't have health insurance because i can't afford to provide m&m's with my name printed on them? please.
i feel incredibly duped about what weddings are. before i got engaged, i thought at most weddings everyone got together to throw a celebration FOR the bride and groom. apparently, asking for assistance that isn't financial, and that isn't from your parents, is a faux pas. in fact, there's a list of wedding no-no's ten miles long. no one informed me that it was a faux pas to expect people to pay for their own cocktails. the question i keep hearing is 'well, would you expect guests to pay for their drinks at a party at your own home?' um, yes. i don't have parties, but if i did they would definetly be BYOB. apparently, i'm supposed to put myself in debt to show off my mad hostessing skills. who the fuck am i supposed to be trying to impress?
i actually like attending other people's weddings. i felt honored when invited to the few weddings i've been invited to. there's something very special about celebrating that kind of commitment. i'm a huge sap, i cry when people say their vows. love is a beautiful thing, and it should be shared. when did weddings lose their focus?
weddings shouldn't be about presents, or salmon rolls, or fancy cake, or who had the best favors, or ten foot high centerpeices, or white dresses, or tuxedos, or open bars, or stuffed chicken. weddings are about love. the love that jordan and i share, and the love that we have for our friends and our family. i couldn't care less about if my shoes match the fucking table cloths. while i like registering for gifts [lets face it, comparing the differences between cast iron pans is fun.], i don't care if no one buys me a toaster. i don't care if people buy me anything. in fact, if you're reading this, and i end up having a wedding, and you come to my wedding, and you want to buy us something, get us a couple of bottles of jones soda. it'll set you back two dollars, and it will be way more delicious than a cutlery set.
holy mother of all, i need to end this rant. let's just say it's just no fun at all to plan a no-expectations wedding when half the people think you're in the wrong, and the other half don't couldn't care less if you got hitched in the first place.
there, for the first time in two weeks, i feel better. and if anyone reading this gets married in the future and needs help with their wedding, do let me know. i would love to help you throw an awesome celebration, and i don't care if you feed me. sincerely.